


A Kiss Is Still a Kiss

by corikane



Category: Pitch Perfect (2012)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-09
Updated: 2013-01-09
Packaged: 2017-11-24 07:09:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/631786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/corikane/pseuds/corikane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beca and Jesse kissed - and nothing happened. They didn't have the kind of chemistry Beca thought she may have with someone else. (No copyright infringement intended.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Kiss Is Still a Kiss

It all ended with that kiss. The kiss that should have started their relationship, ended it forever.  
Beca looked at Jesse sheepishly.   
Yes, they had been overwhelmed, mostly Beca had been overwhelmed by the aca-awesome (she would never tell her fellow Bellas that she used the term in her mind) performance they had given. She was high on the applause, on her friends' happiness, on all the things that should make a competition like this so much fun - boy, even Aubrey had losened up during their set and had hugged her in victory. And that's what it was after all: they had won and they knew it. Jesse knew it, too, and he seemed happy for her. Didn't that kind of warrant a kiss - like in a movie. Only, this wasn't a movie and if you kissed a guy outside the movies and nothing happened - like literally nothing, no sparks, no building song, no... lady-feelings - then that was a death sentence for that relationship.  
Beca had kinda hoped this was IT. She liked Jesse, he was goofy but still real and complicated, he was funny and dorky, a little too conventional maybe but most people were conventional in some respects. It had been so perfect, getting to know someone, liking him, making that aca-mazing mix for him. And then - nothing. It was like kissing her non-existent brother.  
"Ahhhh..." Jesse made and touched his lips a little unsure. "That was..."  
"Weird," Beca helped him out.  
"A little, yeah. Do you think our parents may have kept from us that we're close relatives or something?"  
"I wouldn't put it past my dad," she said and he smiled a little.   
"Should I apologize?" he asked embarrassed.  
"Not your fault, I think. God!" Beca exclaimed and laughed a little. "I mean like NOTHING? What is wrong with us? I mean, we're young, we're sexy - well, you're kinda, me... I'm just me but... shouldn't we have awesome chemistry?"  
"We should!" Jesse confirmed. "But we don't."  
"Huh!" Beca fell back into her chair in the row behind Jesse's. She looked over at her friends who were standing all over the place, talking to people who congratulated them, Stacie was flirting with three different guys at once and Beca would bet she had chemistry with each of them. Why didn't she have any chemistry - seemingly - with anyone?   
Her eyes fell on Chloe who was talking to Amy, she was bouncing on the balls of her feet, her red mane whipped, her eyes sparkled. Or maybe... but that was ridiculous, Chloe was her friend, she wasn't even into Beca. Just now she hugged Amy tightly, no doubt, telling her how great she had been. They had all been great and Chloe would make sure to tell everyone, make them feel even better than they already did.  
The next group had already stepped onto the stage but their set seemed to drown in the aftermath of the Bellas' triumph. It was unfortunate for the group.  
When she looked back to her fellow Bellas, she saw them making their way over to her. Chloe was leading everybody and smiling brightly at Beca - by mutual consent - their new captain. Beca got up out of her chair and received a bone-crushing hug.  
"You were ACA-MAZING, Becs," Chloe whispered into a rosy ear that took on an even darker shade by Chloe's words, her body pressed flush against Beca's and the kiss Chloe delivered to the brunette's cheek.  
"You were aca-awesome yourself, Chlo. You crushed those low tones like a pro," she congratulated and felt that the compliment fell short of the one Chloe had given her, of the support, of the love that radiated from her whole being. Chloe was so amazing as she gave so much to the people who knew her and took so little in return.  
Chloe let go of her friend and sat down in the seat beside Beca's, the brunette also sitting down again. Beca reached over and took Chloe's hand, it was probably the first time she had initiated any kind of touch and Chloe looked at her surprised but pleased. Beca leaned over to her and whispered:  
"You're the best." Choe positively beamed at her and that's the last thing Beca would later remember from the ICCA, not the trophy they got, not the kind words of the host, the handshakes, the pats on her shoulders and back - just Chloe's smiling and the way her stomach did a flip-flop at the sight.

The party that followed was epic. Beca would have preferred if it had taken place on her home turf at Barden but it seemed nobody could wait that long and so all the a cappella groups took over a club in the Big Apple. It was a little strange to see these nerdy groups in their different performance uniforms take over the space that was so accustomed to all these hip New Yorkers. Suddenly there were aca-fellows everywhere, dancing, singing, drinking - celebrating that they had come this far in a competition that was only for them. They all felt at the top of the world, they had all won.  
Beca let her eyes roam over the room, smiling at the fun her friends were having. Amy was dancing with two of the guys who wore those ugly toga-kind-of-things, Stacie pressed her perfect body to Unicycle's sculpted form - one couldn't look at it too long, it was too ridiculously sexy - and Chloe... she was dancing with Jesse? Weird, no, not weird at all. Why wouldn't they dance with each other? They knew each other, they liked each other, they looked good together. It just gave Beca a strange feelling in her stomach, one of lost dreams and chocked emotions. Beca turned to the bar which wasn't really a reprieve since there was this huge mirror behind it in which she could still see Jesse being charming and Chloe laughing at his jokes. Damn!  
But the torture didn't last too long. The song ended, Jesse thanked Chloe for the dance and the redhead looked around herself, searching for someone - and obviously finding her when her eyes met Beca's in the mirror. She smiled and came over.  
"Hey," she sang into Beca's ear, turning her around by her shoulders and hugging her again hard. She had always been touchy-feely but this was already the fourth hug of the night for just Beca and each one seemed tighter, more heartfelt. And Beca found herself giving it back in kind. "Can you believe this crowd? This is the most aca-awesome party I've ever been on. Just think of it - New York!" Chloe whooped and Beca laughed. The redhead has had her share of alcoholic beverages of the night, not surprisingly since she was one of the acas who was legally allowed to drink - Beca was not and she was nursing a coke.  
"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself," Beca yelled over the crowd's ruckus.  
"Aren't you?" Chloe asked back, looking questioningly at her friend. Beca smiled but it must have slipped a little. "You're not jealous, are you? I mean, Jesse just asked me if I wanted to dance with him, I thought it was okay," the redhead defended herself. Beca put up a hand.  
"It's okay, Jesse can dance with whomever he wants," Beca tried to reassure Chloe but her friend looked even more worried at this. She looked around herself and then took Beca by the hand. She let her right out of the front door of the club, the music and other noises muffled instantly and it was almost a shock to Beca's ears. Not that New York on a Saturday night wasn't loud but at least they didn't need to shout at each other here.  
"What is wrong?" Chloe asked when she turned to her friend.  
"There's nothing wrong, Chlo, really," Beca said. She tried to convey her sincerity with her eyes but Chloe still looked suspiciously at the brunette.  
"Are you real? I mean, just an hour ago you were serenading this guy you have been flirting with all year, you couldn't get off-stage fast enough and you guys kissed - and suddenly he is free to dance with whomever? What did I miss?" Beca bit her lip. It was embarrassing to say, even more embarrassing than it had been with Jesse. At least with Jesse she had been sure he would understand. She wasn't sure Chloe would. It was indeed too ridiculous for words, after a whole year of flirting with Jesse, Beca suddenly found out that he wasn't IT. Or aca-awkward, as Amy would put it.  
"You saw us kissing, huh?"  
"Ah, yeah, duh. Everyone did," but there was a slight tightening of Chloe's jaw, a shift in her demeanor Beca couldn't quite read.  
"Yeah, well... I didn't feel anything, that is, none of us did. No chemistry, no fireworks. It was like kissing my brother - if I had one."  
"Really?" Chloe seemed stunned, but the slight set to her jaw vanished immediately and Beca wondered if she had just imagined it. Her bright blue eyes looked so intently into Beca's darker ones that it was beyond the brunette to look away.  
"Really," she confirmed. Chloe smiled softly but just until she became aware of it, then she said:  
"I mean, that... well, I'm sorry. You seemed so... into each other."  
"Yeah, I know. It's strange... The girls will have a field day with this, I'm sure. All this preparation for our performance, me totally making a fool of myself over this guy and then... nothing. It was a little disappointing," Beca confessed.  
"Yeah, but... well, I'm surprised. You haven't kissed before tonight?" Chloe asked and Beca shook her head.  
"We almost did once when he got me to watch the ending of The Breakfast Club... he leaned in but I... I didn't want to risk having my vocal chords ripped out by wolves," Beca joked and Chloe smiled in acknowledgement of the Bellas' vow. The smile vanished quickly, though, and then Chloe looked around herself a little awkwardly. She stuffed her hands inside her pockets - a move that Beca had never seen the redhead do, that was usually more Beca's own style.  
"Well... but you're certain, right? There's nothing between Jesse and you?" The taller woman asked, not looking up into Beca's eyes which became a little panicky as a thought manifested inside her brain: Chloe is into Jesse.  
"No, there's nothing. I mean if you're interested in him...," but she couldn't even say it, her voice just died on her. She didn't want Chloe to be into Jesse, she... but she couldn't quite confess her most secret wishes even to herself. She just stood there hoping and then Chloe looked up and shook her head.  
"I'm not interested in Jesse, Beca. He's... not my type." The redhead assured Beca and the Bellas captain felt a great weight just tumble off her chest. She found that she could breathe easier, and that she could smile about Chloe's words. And Chloe smiled, too, and then she slipped her arms around Beca's waiste and pulled her close. They hugged, Beca's arms finding their way around Chloe's shoulders. But it wasn't the kind of hug they had shared all evening, not the exuberant, triumphant embrace of two friends who had made one of their dreams come true, or any kind of hug they had ever shared during their short friendship. This seemed... intimate, sensual, aware of the other person, their body, and all the delicious places they touched. Beca felt her stomach do that flip-flop-thing again and caught her breath before it could come out in a gasp. It lasted for a long moment, both women reluctant to let go of their price - but even more reluctant to have the other know just how much it meant to them. So they parted again, not looking into each other's eyes.  
"Well, we should probably go back in," Beca suggested.  
"Yeah, I think I could use some jiggle juice," Chloe said and then she smiled at Beca. "And I think I wanna dance with my captain," her hand went to her head in a military salute and then she linked arms with Beca who laughed at her antics. They went back into the club.

They did dance together, in fact, once they had started moving together in a rhythm it was impossible for anybody to get between them - and there were some who tried. They just ignored those drunken guys that wanted to get too close by dancing even closer with each other. It felt good, it felt right, and Beca's head spun so much that she didn't even question the suggestion that maybe - just maybe - Chloe was really the one she had chemistry with, the one she clicked with.  
As the time progressed past midnight, the club emptied drastically but there were still some who wanted to dance and these were mostly couples. And this night actually came up with some unexpected couplings and when Beca looked up next - because it seemed like she had been drowning in everything that was Chloe - she observed a mix that left her staring. She pointed for Chloe to look at what she saw and the redhead immediately broke out in laughter at the sight of a tall blonde and an even taller bespectacled guy whose hands and lips were all over each other. Aubrey and Donald - Donald and Aubrey. It was hilarious but also so very fitting.  
"Oh my god," Beca exclaimed.  
"They're so cute," Chloe cooed and then laughed some more. She looked at Beca, her eyes sparkling in that way that told the world she was happy. Beca's stomach did another flip-flop and she wondered whether she had a bug and should consult a doctor. She looked back at Aubrey and Donald who had yet to come up for air and a mischivious glint came into her eyes. She grinned evilly.  
"What?" Chloe asked suspiciously. "No, don't. Leave them alone, please." But Beca shook her head. Chloe latched onto Beca's hand and tried to stop the smaller girl who turned out to be much stronger than she looked and ended up dragging Chloe ever the dance floor to where their friend made out with a Treble.  
"Eh-hum," Beca cleared her throat at Aubrey's ear and the tall blonde nearly jumped at the unexpected noise so near. She looked at Beca first questioningly than a little annoyed.  
"Something you wanted, Beca?"  
"Just... have you ever wondered whether there were wolves located in the greater New York city area?" 'Brey's look was blank until she caught the smirk on Beca's face and the apologetic look from Chloe.  
"Very funny, Mitchell, but I figured - if the captain of the Bellas is breaking her vows, it's a free for all," she gave back. "And now excuse me," She turned coolly back to Donald and latched onto his lips once again.  
"Tsuh," Beca made and turned back to Chloe with an incredulous expression on her face.  
"She kinda does have a point there, Becs," the redhead said. "Come here, I love that song," Chloe once again pulled Baca to her. It was a slow dance, the beat so low it seemed to match Beca's heartbeat, only Beca's heartbeat picked up with the proxomity and feel of Chloe while the song remained slow and quite romantic.  
"Is it one of your lady jams?" The question slipped out before Beca could catch it. She bit her lip but Chloe didn't seem to mind, she at least didn't let go of Beca, her grip on her friend seemed rather to tighten.  
"Maybe," she whispered directly at Beca's ear and the brunette felt goosebumps break out all over her skin. She could feel Chloe's hands on her back, the way they drew sensual circles over the thin material of Beca's shirt, her cheek was pressed against Beca's and the smaller woman could feel Chloe's breath on her neck, it drove her almost literally crazy. Then there was the pressure of breasts against her own, the feel of a flat stomach and thighs. Beca could hardly breathe as she became aware of how close they danced - if you could call it dancing, since they hardly moved at all. This was...  
"Now, whatever happened to that handsome young feller you were kissing earlier, and does he know that you're feeling up your best friend?" Amy was beside them and lay an arm around each pair of shoulders. Beca felt the instinct to jump away from Chloe but the redhead held onto her, as did Amy. The blonde was quite drunk, her sight slightly unfocused and she grinned at her fellow Bellas.  
"I think I saw Jesse leave earlier with Benji," Chloe said and Beca looked at her questioningly, she hadn't seen Jesse since he had danced with Chloe.  
"Too bad, that Benji-kid is kinda cute, don't you think... ah, I guess you guys wouldn't. I thought maybe it would be a good idea to grab a cap and go back to the hotel, you coming?" It all came out in such a rush, Beca was still trying to contemplate what the gist had been when Chloe said:  
"Yeah, that's probably a good idea. We should probably round everybody up and... well, maybe not everybody...," she said with another look at Aubrey and Donald. "Those two have quite the stamina."  
"Yeah, I'm surprised that 'Brey hasn't yet left her lunch all over him, but her stomach seems to hold," Amy commented.  
"It's just when she gets agitated," Chloe said. "And she doesn't seem very agitated now," Amy nodded to that statement. Beca didn't join the conversation, she looked at Chloe who still stood incredibly close, who still had her arms around the brunette but who acted so nonchalantly that one might think that nothing was going on, that Beca had just imagined their... mutual toners. Because there was no mistaking that she at least had one and it was for Chloe. Did Chloe feel any of those things she herself had felt? Was she even aware of what was happening? Or was this just Chloe being her flirty, touchy-feely self, who on top of that was a little drunk?  
"I feel sick," Beca said and broke free from Chloe and Amy so fast, she almost tripped. But she caught herself and ran to where she supposed the restrooms were. She heard Chloe call after her but the sound was faint, very far away.

In the end, she wasn't sick after all. But as she stood in one of the stalls of the club's ladies' room, she held her sides and gasped for air. Beca couldn't seem to breathe, it was as if she'd run a marathon, or was still running it because there just didn't seem to be enough air.  
"Damn," she breathed. She was hyperventilating and wasn't even sure why. Or maybe she had a notion, maybe she just didn't want to face what had her completely lose control.  
"Beca, are you in here?"  
"Go away," Beca said under her breath but Chloe still seemed to have heard her. She tried the door but Beca had locked it.  
"Open up, Beca. It is nothing to be emberrassed about, I have held people's hair before when they are sick. Remember who my best friend is? Come on, Becs..."  
"Leave me alone, please," Beca said and felt tears spring to her eyes. She felt the hurt so acutely that it made her knees buckle and she sank to the floor.  
"Becs? What's going on?"  
"Is she alright?" Amy asked from further away, probably from the door as the beat of the music could be heard now.  
"I don't know," Chloe answered their friend. "Please, Beca, what is wrong?" Beca sobbed, she couldn't help herself. "Beca, open the door!"  
She could see Chloe's knees near the door, she was on the floor just like Beca, her head close to the door, her hand probably touching it. Beca put her own hand to the door, unknowingly exactly at the opposite side of Chloe's.  
"Chloe," she whispered.  
"What is it?"  
"Should I get someone?" Amy asked from the door.  
"No, please," Beca begged, pretty sure only Chloe could hear her.  
"No, it's okay. I got this, Amy. Round up the others and call a cap, okay?"  
"Okay," it sounded hesitant but a moment later the sound of the music vanished. They were alone.  
"Beca?" The brunette let out a ragged breath. She suddenly felt so silly. She wasn't even sure what had caused this sudden panic attack or maybe - once again - she didn't want to think about it. That her emotions had overwhelmed her, that she had feelings... feelings for Chloe and that she was sure, the redhead didn't feel the same way.  
"I'm such an idiot," the Bellas captain exhaled.  
"What? No. You're not an idiot, why would you think that?"  
"Because... I'm sitting here on the floor of a woman's restroom and having a breakdown because..." Beca touched her forehead to the door and closed her eyes tightly. "... because I have feelings for someone... who doesn't like me that way," she finally confessed.  
"Is this about Jesse, Becs? I mean, I know you said..."  
"It is not about Jesse, Chloe, damn it... it's about you!" She almost yelled at her friend and the silence that followed her exclamation almost killed her. She was such an asshole, it wasn't Chloe's fault that she couldn't return her feelings.  
"You... me?" Chloe asked. It shouldn't have made sense but that was exactly how Beca felt, just the two of them, together. Always.  
"I didn't know, Chloe, please believe me... I never thought..."  
"I did," Chloe said. Beca opened her eyes, looking at the door but strangely also through it into those wholesome blue eyes.  
"What?" She whispered.  
"I did... think... about us," Chloe confessed. "I have for some time, actually." Beca blinked at the door. Was Chloe saying what she thought she was saying?  
"Seriously?"  
"Beca," it sounded desperate, like she didn't want the other woman to question her any further or she might confess more, confess everything. Beca reached for the latch for the door, opened it and then pulled herself up. She opened the door. Chloe was still sitting on the floor, her head bowed, she seemed... sad and broken, not at all like Chloe, not at all like she should look.  
"Chloe?" The redhead looked up.  
"I like you, Beca. I have liked you... since forever." Beca kneeled infront of her friend.  
"Why didn't you tell me?"  
"Because you liked Jesse. And because I didn't think you'd like me back even if you didn't like Jesse," Chloe explained reasonably. "And you didn't, I mean... Are you sure you do now?" Chloe seemed reluctant to believe that she could be so lucky as to like someone who liked her back. Beca smiled, then she laughed.  
"I like you. You are... so aca-mazing," She took Chloe's lovely face into her hands, looked deeply into those shining blue eyes and then kissed her. It didn't take long for Chloe to answer this confession and her lips engaged fully with Beca's. Her hand curled behind Beca's neck, pulling her ever closer and flicked her tongue over Beca's lips. They opened to Chloe's enquiring tongue, her own greeting Chloe's. The kiss deepened further, tongues now dancing to their own rhythm. Beca moaned into Chloe, her hands wandering from Chloe's face down her front, carressing what she could reach.  
They lost all sense of time and place - until someone cleared their throat.  
"The cap's here now," they heard Amy's voice and finally parted. They looked up at their fellow Bella who looked apologetically down at them. "I mean if you'd rather stay in this nice ladies' room, they probably won't close for another hour or two..."  
Chloe cleared her throat.  
"No, I think..." she smiled coyly, "I think we're coming... with."  
"Phew, for a moment I thought you'd say... never mind," Amy gave a nervous laugh and blushed. Then she closed the door to give her friends a moment.  
Chloe smiled at Beca.  
"We should probably..."  
"Yeah..."  
"But..."  
"Yeah?" Their voices seemed to overlap in their eagerness and Chloe smiled even brighter than before.  
"I want to continue this. The kissing and the touching and then some," she said. Beca laughed.  
"Yeah," she said and then rolled her eyes at herself. "I want do continue all of that, too." She agreed.  
Chloe took Beca's hand, entwined their fingers.  
"Let's go, the others are waiting," she said and they left the restroom.

On the flight back home

It was late afternoon the same day. All the acas were exhausted and dozing in different states of sleep in their seats. Beca had her arm around Chloe, the redhead leaning on her shoulder - both smiled.  
"I wish we could have seen a little of New York," Chloe whispered in the quiet of the cabin that was mostly inhabited by all the Barden University singers and not many else.  
"That would have been nice. But we can do it some other time," Beca promised.  
"When we're going back to win the ICCAs next year?" Chloe grinned and Beca nodded her head. At that moment the seat infront of them plopped back and Jesse stuck his head through the small gap between the seats.  
"A little overly-confident, are we? Next year we won't make it so easy on you," he said. Beca and Chloe looked surprised, neither had even realized that Jesse was sitting infront of them, that somebody was sitting infront of them. Their surroundings had vanished a little from sight since their kiss last night. The only persons they seemed to be aware of these hours since were each other.  
"Bring it, Swanson," Chloe said and grinned at him. Beca laughed.  
"Oh, we will," Jesse grinned also. Then he looked at Beca. "About last night... I still feel the need to apologize for... that disastrous kiss."  
"Please don't," Beca said. "It's nobody's fault. We just didn't click."  
"Yeah, but I'm that aca-boy..."  
"... and I'm that aca-girl, and we'll never have those aca-children," they laughed. Chloe looked a little alarmed.  
"You better not," she told Beca and the brunette looked down at her.  
"I'm not plannning on any kind of children yet, don't worry. But if I ever do, I'll make sure to ask you beforehand." She teased.  
"Good," Chloe gave back and touched her lips to Beca's. They were aware of Jesse's stare for a second or so and then completely forgot about him as their lips locked more firmly onto each other. When they came up for air, their eyes locked as firmly as their lips before. The tension between them was so palpable, it made Jesse exclaim:  
"God damn, could you stop that!" The girls looked at him, only now remembering that he was there. "You two are...?"  
"Well, it seemed I had loads of chemistry with someone - it just wasn't you," Beca said smiling. Jesse nodded.  
"Yeah, I can see that. In fact, I can feel it all the way over here. Damn... that was... well, next time you want to send a warning this way. You guys are entirely to hot for comfort," Jesse shook his head in an attempt to clear his fogged up brain. Chloe giggled.  
"I know, right!" She said in that overly-confident way she had about everything to do with... all those things people were usually reserved about. Beca snickered, Jesse rolled his eyes.  
"So, I guess there really is no sense in me apologizing anymore," he said.  
"None at all," Beca confirmed.  
"Well, good. I didn't want to think you felt bad about... us and hid in your room and never came out again over the disappointment," he joked.  
"Nope, not gonna happen."  
"Good." He laughed. Then he got out of his seat. "Gonna see what kind of trouble Benji has gotten into. I have an inkling he forgot about one of his small animals in a jacket pocket. Wouldn't want anything to die in there," he excused himself. Chloe laughed.  
"He's really sweet," she said when Jesse was gone. Beca lifted an eyebrow at her.  
"You think so?"  
"Well, you must have thought so, too, or you wouldn't have liked him. Would you?" Chloe smiled and even though Beca tried to keep a neutral expression she completely failed. She laughed.  
"He's an okay-guy," she then confirmed.  
"I was so jealous of him but you know... if you weren't with me, I wish you were with him. He's a good guy," Chloe said.  
"You were jealous?" Beca asked.  
"Yeah, I was but not anymore."  
"Good, because I'd rather be with you than with him. You're a much better kisser." She said and as if to confirm that statement, she leaned in and kissed Chloe again - and again.

The end.


End file.
